I Was So Angry At My Coach

I was so angry at my coach. 

I had just spent $8K (I didn’t have) on a 2 1/2 day business immersion and felt so lost afterwards. 

To be honest, frustrated and pissed off is what I really felt. 

And, I decided to tell that coach. 

Wouldn’t you?

The purpose of the whole event was to have all the systems I needed for my business, solidify my offer, build community, and create clients. 

So many epiphanies happened during the event, but the work I saw that needed to happen even with the map provided felt overwhelming. 

I thought I was gonna get more hands on help, more direction, more support. 

Maybe even clients during the event. That’s why I love immersive trainings. 

I was told it was possible, but that didn’t happen for me. 

I was left to take action and responsibility on my own. Wishing $8K had gotten me more. 

What was really happening?

Me wishing for a savior and that investments would be the substitute to doing the work. 

It wasn’t. 

No coach is there to do the work for you, they can’t read your mind, and they aren’t there to make your choices either. 

Business takes courage, responsibility, and decision making. 

After that event I reviewed my notes and went over the material over and over and over again. 

While I may have been angry, I knew deep down that the coach was right…

My results are my responsibility. That felt like a whole new understanding. 

I wasn’t blaming everyone else anymore for my experience. 

Eventually the resentment wore off as the months went on and I created client after client. 

Creating more confidence in my skills and abilities - taking pride in my results. 

I learned how to handle myself better and create results in a way that worked for me. 

Not a step by step guide that I feel lost with when no one is there to help like we were taught in public school. 

Instead, a self-knowing and understanding of what needs to happen each day and how to do it. 

Four years later, I did more work with that same coach. And I let them know how I felt. 

“I’ve never told you this but when I first worked with you I was so angry at you. You gave us every step and then sent us on our way, I was so used to getting help and support. 

I was wishing for hand holding. 

I want to thank you though, because I see how that really helped me take responsibility and build more courage. 

I appreciate the tough love. 

So, thank you.”

He said: “James, that’s awesome to hear. Not everybody has the same reaction or the same persistence as you.

And that’s what makes you the real deal. You’ve done it and proven yourself creating clients.”

Hearing that felt amazing. 

That’s what I teach my clients now. I do provide more support and coach, but the emphasis still stands on personal power and responsibility. 

Sometimes, a little tough love. 

Do the strategies from programs out there work - most do. 

It’s where we’re at on our journey, self-understanding, and our persistence that gets us to the finish line. 

Sometimes you may take longer than others, like I did, and that’s okay. 

Set yourself up with the right coach to help you grow and learn to lead yourself. 

Even using the strategies you’ve already paid for, learning how to tailor them to your personality and work style - that’s what I help my clients with. 

The better you get at that, the faster you’ll reach your goals.