Leaving A Soul Sucking Decision

Continuing from our post on Monday, how do we regain that passion that we once had? Clearly we’ve become disoriented and not doing what drives us. We feel stuck, and rightfully should. You did what you were “supposed to do” - You figured out what you wanted, worked hard at it, but something didn’t happen: the results you wanted. From there it most likely went downhill, because when we’re not doing what we really want on a repetitive basis we will most certainly lose our stamina and passion, as I’m sure you, and I, have already experienced. So let’s get right into getting back on track.

The difference between our job, schooling, goals, projects, and all the other stuff in our life is that we’re tied to them. Not in the sense that we spend so much time there (because we do), but in the sense of how much of our self we put into them. We spend hours away grueling over work that we put our heart into, a degree that we want to earn, or goals and projects that we want to make happen and bring into fruition. But when we realize part way through that it’s not what we really wanted or that the path is not what we were really looking for, how do we walk away from something we spent so much time pursuing? It’s like it was done for nothing. Possibly it was, but most likely that’s not the case.

If you’ve lost your passion, admit to yourself now that where you’re at is not where you want to be. It can be scary when you’re worried about money, you have a family to support, or you’re getting ready for retirement. Remember that life is for the adventure. Do you want to die happy, or live long because that’s the thing to do? I don’t think it matters when you die, it matters the content and quality of your life. But, what you must understand is that you can move forward and make a change. People often expect huge results overnight from one day's work. Ever hear the phrase - You pick one flower at a time to make a bouquet, not all at once? Because I’ve never heard it, I just made it up. What I mean is that you have to choose wisely what you would like to be part of your plan and then take action to gradually build upon it to create visible results. Don’t use all your might in one night and be empty for the rest of the week. You won’t get as far and you will be let down very easily. It took me awhile to learn to pace myself, I’m still learning, but you’ll be much happier in the end.

So if you’re in a job you don’t like... + If you find that you no longer like your job, then explore other options. It’s not about knowing what to look for next, it’s about experimenting. Search on Career Builder for a job that you think would interest you. Go through all of them if you have to. Although we may not know where to begin, we will know where to navigate based on past results. Jobs you’ve had before, what you do or don’t like doing. It’s all feedback to help you figure out what you really want. Keep working to find something you like.

+ If you can’t move up because you don’t have a degree, you can either get the degree or take another route. Perhaps apply to other jobs in a similar field that you like, a degree is not an end all be all. It’s a hot commodity today, but if you know how to sell yourself and “work” the people you deal with then usually you can pull some strings.

+ Let’s say you realize that you want to work for yourself and it pains you to go to work each day. Take some actions each day to build your business, even if it’s learning how. Just do some research online.

College + Perhaps you’re getting a degree you realize that you don’t really want after two or three, or maybe even four years of hard work put into it. See if you can easily double major to get a more appropriate degree. If not, see option 2 right below.

+ So you’re about to graduate or you're so far along in your college career that you don’t want to change because you’d have to put in so many more years. Don’t worry. There’s been plenty of people who have healthy careers with degrees in a totally different field. As I was always told “you can get a degree in dog shit for the most part, it’s about the skills that you have,” unless you’re getting certified in a specific field, like teaching and architecture. So make sure that you focus your efforts on what you really want. Best of all, work with a career coach at your school to get closer to figuring out what you really want.

+ If you find that you have a whole other passion that does require certification. Find a relative field that you could enter to maintain your passion while you work to achieve your more appropriate degree.

Goals/projects + It will pain you at first, but put them all on the back burner and explore and experiment some other options. Keep what you have because you may use it later, but don’t get stuck on them.

+ In your new endeavors, remember to ask yourself “are the goals/projects worthy of me?” not “am I worthy of these goals/projects?”  It will make your life so much easier and selective.

Hopefully some of those insights have helped. I’m sure I didn’t cover every person's situation, but I hoped to better help you in determining your course of action, or inaction. Remember the three options below and apply them to any situation in your life to choose an outcome more to your liking.

You Always Have Three Options

+ Accept the situation

+ Change the situation

+ Leave the situation

If anyone has been through these situations, what course of actions did you take?